Perry & Terry ask you “The Next Question…”


Next question….?

At what point it is that your washboard stomach becomes a twin tub?

Why it is some people when they walk make noises like a pub sign in high winds?

Why some public swimming baths insist on having a tidemark of body fat around the inside pool edge to remind the attendants to keep it full?

Why people iron knife-edge creases in the front of denims? I bet they put eye pencil marks up the back of their legs during the Blitz too.

How it is for some individuals that polishing up your council house doorknocker and Yale lock fills tower block tenants with pride just to give smack addicts a clue how to find a dealer.

Why business people who operate Internet businesses from a maisonette in Swansea expect you to invest with them?

Should motorists who drive a Ferrari to go to ‘Netto’?

Why is it that approaching 40 from the right direction means you need extra notches on your belt in the wrong direction?

Why do European lotteries that already say you are a ‘winner’ promise you in black and white that you have won the £100,000 jackpot and assure you of the win within 9 days only if you give them all your payment card details to join the program? You feverishly send off the winning claim return of post and then the bastards take £50 a time out of your account for the next 12 months and when you ask where your cash prize is they tell you missed the deadline?

Why it is seminars on ‘time management’ often re-scheduled?

Why it is TV rental companies that you have been paying for decades only accept your cancellation if you promise to give three months notice first and that they give you the option of buying the existing equipment as a one-off sale for roughly the same amount of rent you have to pay in the interim?

Why do dentists or opticians wear paper masks? Should you sit there with a peg on your nose to find out who has the problem?

Why Borax is still sold in Boots when 35mm Kodak cameras are soon not going to be?

Why it is ‘Duraglit’ was never used to overpower the Taliban? My mother passed out using it on the family brass once.

Why people tell you something is ‘unacceptable?’ What is acceptable then? A good slap?

Why people are fooled by ‘one-basket’ supermarket queues that they think
will somehow become more rapid? There are three times as many transactions and hence more delay? Now you have ‘just cash queues’ or ‘barcode your own’ queues. Why not just go to a corner shop or the market and pay a little more for some friendly service and get your paper delivered too? The whole high street is disappearing because we have mega stores now? If we all decided to boycott all the stores just one day a week and shop with family traders then we will all understand the phrase ‘Every little helps” and stop these huge stores looking like airports and preserve some tradition and family heritage.

Why is it people say ‘clean as whistle’? Not if you have just been eating a croissant its not.

Why people think they are so special because they have ‘majored’ in something? They annoy me to a degree.

Why packets of crisps cost you half a quid to have the end of a potato inside that is scrunched, or either black or green?

Why do we expect two minutes silence on Armistice day from O.A.P’sbut cannot expect it any other time of the year?

Why some people cause traffic chaos when protesting about an accident black spot?

Why some bosses who take the rise by not increasing your wages?

Why some quadriplegics seem to take everything in their stride.

Why people too tight to buy fireworks put their kids ‘light up’ trainers in the washing machine on half cycle and sit in the dark instead?

Why pacifists have very strong principles until they have to fight for them?

Why just because you ‘could murder a bowl of porridge for a change’ could turn you into a cereal killer?

Why perceptive Botox injectors can read between the lines?

What day in your life is it that you decide to get in your car with your arse first instead of your feet?

Why ‘Wilkinsons’ have a security guard? Everything is so cheap who would bother stealing anything?

What is it about a rowing machine or exercise bike that seem to have done their jobs so well, that they end up at re-cycle yards by the dozen?

Why, very well spoken pregnant women who are told that they can express milk and have a well pronounced labia?

Why repetitive mosquitoes like to sue other repetitive mosquitoes just to get an aphid-aphid?

Why prostitutes refuse to make homemade jam because it’s always just a little tart?

Why suicide bombers like to be in two or three places at once?

Why suicide bombing is blown out of all proportion.

Why glove puppeteers become gynaecologists in order to keep their hand in?

Why art impressionists have to see dentists with a different palate?

Why you have to tell your dentist that you have already taken a disclosure tablet?

Why it is that individuals collect other peoples Giro cheques when it is not for their own benefit?

Why eating toad in the hole too quickly can give you a frog in your throat?

Why some multi-orgasms are not anything to shout about?

Why with some orgasms someone’s ‘sighs’ does matter?

Why gold diggers fall out of work with few prospects?

Why some spurned surgeons believe ‘that the first cut is the deepest’?

What about the Captain of the Titanic who couldn’t get a hat to fit him because he didn’t know about the cap size?

Why it is at horror movies you find a chill down the back of your neck is from an ice cream lost by the kid sitting behind you?

Why it is some gynaecologists become game-show hosts just so they can keep their finger on the buzzers?

Why tacky people no longer have to lick stamps at Christmas but still seem to have a tasteless Christmas?

Why is it when Jesus said to his apostles “my door is always open” we must conclude that is he was born in a barn.

Why cheap clothes fall to pieces every time you want to wear them out?

Why women try to trick their partners into oral sex but they won’t be sucked in?

Why bossy gravediggers always like to have plenty of people under them, but complain when they get under his feet?

Why it is some people say to you in cemeteries, ‘Mornin’, and you have to answer, “Yes

At what point it is that your washboard stomach becomes a twin tub?

Why it is some people when they walk make noises like a pub sign in high winds?

Why some public swimming baths insist on having a tidemark of body fat around the inside pool edge to remind the attendants to keep it full?

Why people iron knife-edge creases in the front of denims? I bet they put eye pencil marks up the back of their legs during the Blitz too.

How it is for some individuals that polishing up your council house doorknocker and Yale lock fills tower block tenants with pride just to give smack addicts a clue how to find a dealer.

Why business people who operate Internet businesses from a maisonette in Swansea expect you to invest with them?

Should motorists who drive a Ferrari to go to ‘Netto’?

Why is it that approaching 40 from the right direction means you need extra notches on your belt in the wrong direction?

Why do European lotteries that already say you are a ‘winner’ promise you in black and white that you have won the £100,000 jackpot and assure you of the win within 9 days only if you give them all your payment card details to join the program? You feverishly send off the winning claim return of post and then the bastards take £50 a time out of your account for the next 12 months and when you ask where your cash prize is they tell you missed the deadline?

Why it is seminars on ‘time management’ often re-scheduled?

Why it is TV rental companies that you have been paying for decades only accept your cancellation if you promise to give three months notice first and that they give you the option of buying the existing equipment as a one-off sale for roughly the same amount of rent you have to pay in the interim?

Why do dentists or opticians wear paper masks? Should you sit there with a peg on your nose to find out who has the problem?

Why Borax is still sold in Boots when 35mm Kodak cameras are soon not going to be?

Why it is ‘Duraglit’ was never used to overpower the Taliban? My mother passed out using it on the family brass once.

Why people tell you something is ‘unacceptable?’ What is acceptable then? A good slap?

Why people are fooled by ‘one-basket’ supermarket queues that they think
will somehow become more rapid? There are three times as many transactions and hence more delay? Now you have ‘just cash queues’ or ‘barcode your own’ queues. Why not just go to a corner shop or the market and pay a little more for some friendly service and get your paper delivered too? The whole high street is disappearing because we have mega stores now? If we all decided to boycott all the stores just one day a week and shop with family traders then we will all understand the phrase ‘Every little helps” and stop these huge stores looking like airports and preserve some tradition and family heritage.

Why is it people say ‘clean as whistle’? Not if you have just been eating a croissant its not.

Why people think they are so special because they have ‘majored’ in something? They annoy me to a degree.

Why packets of crisps cost you half a quid to have the end of a potato inside that is scrunched, or either black or green?

Why do we expect two minutes silence on Armistice day from O.A.P’sbut cannot expect it any other time of the year?

Why some people cause traffic chaos when protesting about an accident black spot?

Why some bosses who take the rise by not increasing your wages?

Why some quadriplegics seem to take everything in their stride.

Why people too tight to buy fireworks put their kids ‘light up’ trainers in the washing machine on half cycle and sit in the dark instead?

Why pacifists have very strong principles until they have to fight for them?

Why just because you ‘could murder a bowl of porridge for a change’ could turn you into a cereal killer?

Why perceptive Botox injectors can read between the lines?

What day in your life is it that you decide to get in your car with your arse first instead of your feet?

Why ‘Wilkinsons’ have a security guard? Everything is so cheap who would bother stealing anything?

What is it about a rowing machine or exercise bike that seem to have done their jobs so well, that they end up at re-cycle yards by the dozen?

Why, very well spoken pregnant women who are told that they can express milk and have a well pronounced labia?

Why repetitive mosquitoes like to sue other repetitive mosquitoes just to get an aphid-aphid?

Why prostitutes refuse to make homemade jam because it’s always just a little tart?

Why suicide bombers like to be in two or three places at once?

Why suicide bombing is blown out of all proportion.

Why glove puppeteers become gynaecologists in order to keep their hand in?

Why art impressionists have to see dentists with a different palate?

Why you have to tell your dentist that you have already taken a disclosure tablet?

Why it is that individuals collect other peoples Giro cheques when it is not for their own benefit?

Why eating toad in the hole too quickly can give you a frog in your throat?

Why some multi-orgasms are not anything to shout about?

Why with some orgasms someone’s ‘sighs’ does matter?

Why gold diggers fall out of work with few prospects?

Why some spurned surgeons believe ‘that the first cut is the deepest’?

What about the Captain of the Titanic who couldn’t get a hat to fit him because he didn’t know about the cap size?

Why it is at horror movies you find a chill down the back of your neck is from an ice cream lost by the kid sitting behind you?

Why it is some gynaecologists become game-show hosts just so they can keep their finger on the buzzers?

Why tacky people no longer have to lick stamps at Christmas but still seem to have a tasteless Christmas?

Why is it when Jesus said to his apostles “my door is always open” we must conclude that is he was born in a barn.

Why cheap clothes fall to pieces every time you want to wear them out?

Why women try to trick their partners into oral sex but they won’t be sucked in?

Why bossy gravediggers always like to have plenty of people under them, but complain when they get under his feet?

Why it is some people say to you in cemeteries, ‘Mornin’, and you have to answer, “Yes, I am actually.”

Why some parrots come out with things that are unrepeatable?

Why some taxidermists stuff parrots with Polyfilla?

One Comment:

  1. hey there and thanks in your information ? I’ve definitely picked up something new from here. I did then gain expertise and few technical issues with the use of this website, as I reloaded the site a lot of occasions previous. I may just get it to load properly. I have been pondering if your web host is OK? Not that I am complaining, but sluggish loading causes will very frequently affect your placement in google and could harm your high-quality rating if ads and marketing with Adwords. Well I am including this RSS to my e-mail and could look out for a lot more of your respective intriguing content. Make sure you update this again very soon..

Comments are closed